Ah, baseball. America’s pastime. The sport that once captivated the nation and now serves as a three-hour nap for insomniacs. But let’s not kid ourselves, there are a few things that still get the blood pumping in the world of Major League Baseball. No, it’s not the home run record chases or the steroid scandals—it’s the rivalries. Because what’s better than watching millionaires argue over a children’s game? Here are the top 10 MLB rivalries, in all their overhyped glory.

1. New York Yankees vs. Boston Red Sox

The rivalry that’s been beaten to death more than a piñata at a birthday party. Yankees fans think they own the world because of their 27 championships. Red Sox fans think breaking an 86-year curse makes them underdogs forever. Spoiler: you’re both obnoxious.

This rivalry dates back to 1919, when the Red Sox sold Babe Ruth to the Yankees. Cue the “Curse of the Bambino,” an 86-year championship drought for Boston. Every game between these two teams is a battle, with fans more invested in hating each other than in the actual outcome. From brawls to epic comebacks, this rivalry has it all, including an insufferable amount of media coverage.

2. Chicago Cubs vs. St. Louis Cardinals

This one’s like watching two elderly men argue over who’s better at shuffleboard. Sure, there’s history, but unless you’re from Chicago or St. Louis, you probably don’t care. And even if you are, do you really?

The Cubs-Cardinals rivalry is rooted in geography and the old National League. They’ve been at each other’s throats since the 1880s. The Cubs, with their century-long World Series drought, and the Cardinals, with their 11 championships, provide a classic underdog versus perennial contender storyline. But at the end of the day, it’s two fanbases bickering over who has the better deep-dish pizza.

3. Los Angeles Dodgers vs. San Francisco Giants

The West Coast clash that’s mostly an excuse for fans to complain about time zone differences. Dodgers fans have a shiny new World Series to flaunt, while Giants fans cling to their even-year magic like it’s the last life raft on the Titanic.

Transplanted from New York to California in 1958, the Dodgers and Giants brought their rivalry with them. It’s a tale of two cities—Los Angeles and San Francisco—both thinking they’re the epitome of West Coast greatness. The games are intense, the fans are rabid, and the pettiness is off the charts. Whether it’s a walk-off homer or a benches-clearing brawl, this rivalry rarely disappoints.

4. New York Mets vs. Philadelphia Phillies

The “We Both Suck But Let’s Hate Each Other Anyway” rivalry. Mets fans are perpetually miserable, and Phillies fans are, well, Phillies fans. It’s like watching two people fight over the last stale donut.

Both teams have a knack for disappointing their fans in spectacular fashion. The Mets’ bullpen could make a grown man cry, and the Phillies’ defense is a comedy of errors. Yet, when these two teams face off, it’s a grudge match. The fans love to hate each other, and the players often join in. It’s a rivalry born out of mutual disdain and a shared love of suffering.

5. Chicago White Sox vs. Cleveland Guardians

The battle of who can stay relevant the longest. Spoiler alert: neither. The real competition here is who has the least amount of fair-weather fans. Good luck with that.

The White Sox and Guardians (formerly the Indians) have been duking it out in the AL Central for years. It’s a rivalry overshadowed by their more famous city counterparts, but that doesn’t mean it lacks intensity. Both teams have had their moments of glory, but more often than not, they’re fighting for scraps. It’s the baseball equivalent of a bar brawl in a dive bar.

6. Houston Astros vs. Everyone

Let’s be real, when your team is known more for cheating than winning, everyone’s going to hate you. The Astros have become the universal villain of MLB, and honestly, it’s the most entertaining thing they’ve ever done.

The Astros’ sign-stealing scandal has earned them the ire of every other team in the league. From booing fans to players getting plunked, the fallout has been glorious. This isn’t just a rivalry with one team; it’s Houston against the world. And let’s face it, watching the Astros squirm under the spotlight is the best thing to happen to baseball in years.

7. Kansas City Royals vs. St. Louis Cardinals

The “We’re in the Same State But Nobody Cares” rivalry. Sure, it’s called the I-70 Series, but let’s not pretend anyone outside of Missouri is losing sleep over this one.

The Royals and Cardinals have been rivals since their 1985 World Series clash. The Cardinals, with their storied history, often look down on the Royals, who occasionally punch above their weight. It’s a sibling rivalry where the little brother occasionally lands a good punch, but everyone knows who’s really in charge.

8. Toronto Blue Jays vs. Texas Rangers

Remember that one time José Bautista flipped his bat and all of Texas lost their collective minds? Yeah, that’s pretty much it. A rivalry built on one moment of pettiness. Classic.

The Blue Jays and Rangers’ rivalry peaked during the 2015 and 2016 playoffs. Bautista’s epic bat flip in 2015 and the ensuing brawl in 2016 are what legends are made of. It’s a rivalry based on a few explosive moments, but man, were they memorable. Texas fans still hate Bautista, and Blue Jays fans still relish every moment of it.

9. Oakland Athletics vs. Los Angeles Angels

This rivalry is as washed up as the players they overpay. Both teams fight for the title of “Best Team in a State That Doesn’t Care About Baseball.” It’s like watching a snail race.

The A’s and Angels have been battling for relevance in California for decades. The A’s are the scrappy underdogs with a shoestring budget, while the Angels are the big spenders who can’t seem to get out of their own way. It’s a rivalry full of missed opportunities and what-ifs. The games might not be must-see TV, but the animosity is real.

10. Miami Marlins vs. Washington Nationals

The battle for the most irrelevant franchise. The Marlins win World Series titles and then disappear for decades. The Nationals took forever to get their first title and now act like they’ve been a powerhouse forever. Yawn.

The Marlins and Nationals are two franchises that have spent more time in the basement than the penthouse. The Marlins’ strategy of winning a World Series and then dismantling the team is as baffling as it is effective. The Nationals, meanwhile, finally won a title in 2019 and now think they’re the Yankees. It’s a rivalry that’s more about who can be less terrible.