Welcome back to Hot Garbage, where we cut through the crap and serve you the real deal. Today, we’re counting down the top 10 casino games you absolutely must try. Whether you’re a seasoned gambler or a clueless newbie, these games will either make you rich or make you question your life choices. Let’s dive in, complete with some strategies to help you not suck.

1. Poker: The Ultimate Mind Game

Why You Should Play:

• Poker is the granddaddy of all casino games. It’s where skill meets strategy, and where bluffing can turn you into a legend or a laughingstock. Plus, it’s the only game where wearing sunglasses indoors is socially acceptable.

Strategy:

• Know Your Hands: Memorize the hand rankings. If you think a straight beats a flush, you’re in trouble.

• Bluff Wisely: Don’t overdo it. Bluffing works best when used sparingly and strategically.

• Pay Attention: Observe your opponents. Notice betting patterns and behaviors.

• Position Matters: Play more hands in a late position where you can see what others do first.

2. Blackjack: Beat the Dealer, Not Yourself

Why You Should Play:

• Simple rules, fast pace, and the illusion that you have some control over the outcome. What’s not to love? Plus, it’s the only game where getting 21 isn’t a reason to call the cops.

Strategy:

• Basic Strategy Chart: Memorize a basic strategy chart to know when to hit, stand, split, or double down.

• Card Counting: If you’re feeling daring (and have the memory for it), learn to count cards. Just don’t get caught.

• Manage Your Bankroll: Set a budget and stick to it. Chasing losses is a quick way to lose even more.

3. Roulette: Spin to Win

Why You Should Play:

• Roulette is all about luck and a giant spinning wheel. It’s flashy, it’s fun, and it makes you feel like you’re in a James Bond movie.

Strategy:

• Bet Outside: Focus on outside bets (red/black, odd/even) for better odds.

• Avoid Single Number Bets: They have the highest payout but the worst odds.

• Martingale System: Double your bet after a loss, but be prepared for the risk of losing big.

4. Slots: The One-Armed Bandit

Why You Should Play:

• Slots are the ultimate in mindless gambling. Flashy lights, catchy sounds, and the promise of a big payout keep you coming back for more. Plus, you can play with one hand while holding a drink in the other.

Strategy:

• Bet Max on Progressive Slots: To qualify for the big jackpot, you often need to bet the maximum.

• Play High RTP Games: Choose slots with a high return-to-player (RTP) percentage.

• Set Limits: Decide how much you’re willing to lose and don’t go over it.

5. Craps: Roll the Dice, Take a Chance

Why You Should Play:

• Craps is exciting, loud, and a social experience. The energy around the table is infectious, and everyone’s rooting for a win.

Strategy:

• Pass Line Bet: Start with a pass line bet; it’s simple and has a low house edge.

• Odds Bet: After a pass line bet, make an odds bet to take advantage of one of the best bets in the casino.

• Avoid Proposition Bets: These bets have a high house edge and are best left alone.

6. Baccarat: James Bond’s Favorite

Why You Should Play:

• Baccarat is elegant, sophisticated, and relatively simple. Plus, you can pretend you’re as cool as James Bond, even if you’re far from it.

Strategy:

• Bet on the Banker: The banker bet has the lowest house edge.

• Avoid the Tie Bet: The tie bet offers a high payout but has terrible odds.

• Commission Consideration: Be aware of the commission taken on banker bets, usually 5%.

7. Pai Gow Poker: The Best of Both Worlds

Why You Should Play:

• This game combines elements of poker and dominoes, giving you the best of both worlds. It’s unique and offers a slower pace, perfect for those who like to take their time.

Strategy:

• Two Hands: Focus on making two strong hands (one five-card hand, one two-card hand).

• House Way: Learn the “house way” to understand how the dealer sets their hand.

• Banker Advantage: If possible, act as the banker to gain a slight edge.

8. Keno: Lottery-Style Fun

Why You Should Play:

• Keno is like playing the lottery but faster. Pick your numbers and hope they get called. It’s simple and doesn’t require much thought.

Strategy:

• Pick Fewer Numbers: Choosing fewer numbers improves your odds slightly.

• Stick to a Budget: Set a limit on how much you’re willing to spend and stick to it.

• Don’t Chase Losses: Treat it like buying a lottery ticket and don’t expect to win big.

9. Three Card Poker: Quick and Dirty

Why You Should Play:

• It’s poker, but faster and with fewer cards. Perfect for those with short attention spans. Plus, the potential for big payouts keeps things interesting.

Strategy:

• Play/Ante Bet: Stick to the play/ante bet for better odds.

• Raise with Q-6-4 or Better: Raise when you have Queen-6-4 or better, otherwise fold.

• Pair Plus Bet: It’s a high-risk bet, so use it sparingly.

10. Bingo: Not Just for Grandma

Why You Should Play:

• Bingo is surprisingly fun and can be a great social activity. Plus, the thrill of shouting “Bingo!” is unmatched.

Strategy:

• Buy More Cards: Increase your chances by playing more cards.

• Choose Less Crowded Games: Play during off-peak times to improve your odds of winning.

• Stay Alert: Pay attention to the numbers called and mark your cards quickly.

Conclusion

There you have it, folks. The top 10 casino games that you absolutely must try, complete with strategies to help you not suck. Whether you’re looking for skill-based games or just want to leave it all to chance, there’s something on this list for everyone. Just remember, gambling is a fast track to an empty wallet, but at least you’ll have some fun along the way. Happy gambling, and may the odds be ever in your favor!

Ready to try your luck on the iGaming library? Play on BetMGM Online Casino today!