Well, folks, we gave it a shot. We gave The Rings of Power every opportunity to redeem itself after a wobbly first season. But here we are, staring at the wreckage of Season 2 like Frodo staring at the One Ring—exhausted, disillusioned, and wondering if it was all worth it. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.

When Amazon Prime threw a literal billion dollars at Tolkien’s legendarium, we all held our breath. Some of us were hopeful; others had that gnawing feeling in the pit of our stomachs. Could the second season really rise from the ashes of its underwhelming predecessor? Could we actually get some nuanced character development, a story arc that didn’t feel like it was scribbled in a rush, and dialogue that didn’t sound like it was written by a medieval Twitter bot?

No. We couldn’t. In fact, Season 2 doubled down on everything that didn’t work the first time around.

Characters With Less Depth Than a Puddle

Remember how Season 1 introduced us to a dozen or so new characters with vague motivations, undefined arcs, and personalities that could be summed up in a single sentence? Yeah, Season 2 was all about keeping that energy. If anything, they found a way to make characters even less interesting. Galadriel? Still stuck in a weird emotional limbo between warrior princess and smug philosopher. Elrond? Somehow even more broody. The new additions? Don’t even get me started.

The characters, rather than evolving, feel like they’re spinning their wheels, trapped in repetitive dialogue and nonsensical decision-making. And don’t tell me this is a “slow burn” approach. There’s a difference between taking time to craft a character and just throwing them in a scene for no apparent reason other than “Hey, you haven’t seen this elf in 40 minutes. Here’s a reminder they exist.”

Plot Twists You Can See Coming a Mile Away

One of the biggest crimes of Season 2 is that it plays it safe. You can see the plot twists coming from the Shire. Season 1 already made it clear that subtlety is not the showrunners’ strong suit, and Season 2 took that as a challenge to make the writing even more predictable. Half the “big reveals” in the season felt like they were telegraphed in such obvious ways that even the Ents saw them coming.

And let’s talk pacing. What is it with this series and its absolute refusal to pick a narrative lane? Is it a grand epic? A character-driven drama? A political intrigue? All of the above, you say? Well, sure, that could work if the show had any idea how to balance those elements, but instead, it’s like watching an editor accidentally shuffle three different TV shows into one episode and just call it a day.

Visuals Over Substance (Again)

Look, no one’s denying that The Rings of Power is pretty. The scenery is breathtaking, the CGI is on point, and the costumes? Chef’s kiss. But for a billion-dollar show, you’d think they could invest in, you know, writing. Apparently, Amazon missed that memo, because the story continues to be as shallow as a hobbit’s kiddie pool.

Sure, it’s great that you can see every leaf in a Rivendell tree swaying in the breeze, but when the plot is held together by duct tape and hope, all that eye candy starts to feel a little…hollow. It’s like buying a gourmet meal and realizing halfway through that it’s just pretty garnish on an empty plate.

What Are the Stakes Again?

By the end of Season 2, I couldn’t even tell you what the stakes were supposed to be. Is Middle-earth in peril? Are we supposed to care about these new rings that everyone keeps whispering about in hushed tones? The show doesn’t seem to know either. Rather than setting up a clear conflict, Season 2 meanders through vague threats and ill-defined dangers, leaving us wondering why we should care about any of it.

And let’s not forget the villain problem. For a show called The Rings of Power, you’d think the antagonists would be powerful. But the big baddies here are about as intimidating as a hobbit after second breakfast. They show up, make vague threats, and disappear into the shadows, leaving the viewer with more confusion than dread.

The Tolkien Problem

Here’s the thing: adapting Tolkien is hard. Like, really hard. But the showrunners aren’t just stumbling over Tolkien’s massive world-building—they’re actively tripping and falling down the stairs. Rather than embracing the deep lore and complex mythology that make Middle-earth so rich, The Rings of Power continues to treat Tolkien’s work like a buffet, picking out the flashy bits and leaving behind the substance.

Season 2 had the potential to dive deeper into Tolkien’s lore, to explore the complexities of power, corruption, and heroism. But instead, we got a watered-down version that feels more like a D&D campaign gone wrong than a faithful adaptation of one of the most beloved fantasy worlds of all time.

So…What Now?

At this point, it’s hard to say what the future holds for The Rings of Power. Season 2 was supposed to be the show’s big comeback, its opportunity to win over the skeptics and silence the critics. Instead, it feels like a retread of Season 1’s biggest mistakes: shallow characters, a meandering plot, and visuals that prioritize style over substance.

Could Season 3 turn things around? Maybe. But after two seasons of disappointment, it’s hard to muster much optimism. As it stands, The Rings of Power feels less like the crown jewel of fantasy television and more like a very expensive experiment gone wrong.

Maybe it’s time for Amazon to drop the ring in Mount Doom and walk away.